Friday, May 02, 2008

I don't know how to...

...take a day off.

Today I need the day off. I think allergies are catching up to me. I've had one of those low-grade, annoying headaches all week, with pressure behind my eyes. I'm tired. I've decided not to go into the office - and it's a very hard decision to make.

Why? I wish I knew. Other people have no problem taking a day off. DH for instance never feels guilty about his days off, which are spent [I grudingly admit] as one should spend a day off. He lounges in front of the TV and relaxes.

On my 'days off' I do a few extra loads of laundry. I clean closets. I make ambitious plans to reorganize the entire house and parts of the Northern Hemisphere.

I can't relax.

I really wish I knew why. I have this constant, driving need to be doing something contructive at all times until my head explodes. I really hate it. I mean, I like to get things done. I like to be busy actually, and on the rare occasion I really don't have anything to do, I usually start some new project, but sheesh, I just can't shut it off.

Today should be spent lounging on the couch, watching my Torchwood DVDs or reading for pleasure. A nice breakfast, a leisurely lunch, a phone call to a friend. Meanwhile I'm sitting here frantically blogging, and planning which room I will tackle first and thinking how nice it will be to get a jump on the laundry. I already have a craft project swimming around in my head and my mind is spinning with revisions for short story I just sold to Samhain [more on that later].

Why can't I just take a sick day like the rest of world and curl up with a blankie and a cupa tea?

Don't know. Can't do it. Help!


Jen said...

Maybe you could try to trick yourself? Tell yourself "I'm taking an hour off". That way you won't feel like a slug for "wasting" the day. Then, maybe like so many other things, once you get started on your downtime, it'll be easier to keep it going.

Bernadette Gardner and Jennifer Colgan said...

My brain is always ahead of me. It says, "You can rest after you do this, that and the other thing." By then half the day is gone. I'm just a compulsive do-er. Can't help it.